How Can I Make the Best Version of Myself?

Every year on Valentine's Day, we focus so much on making our loved ones happy and sharing our love with them that we forget the most important person in our lives: ourselves. However, the source of the love we give to others comes from our own self-love. The more we love ourselves and focus on developing ourselves, the more love we can reflect to those around us. The first step to this is to get to know ourselves.

We need to know who we are, what we like and dislike, so that we can invite the right people into our lives and enrich our time with activities that truly make us feel good. For example, have you ever tried growing plants? Buy some new seeds one day and try growing them in pots. See how the attention and love you give to that plant makes you feel. Or join a pottery workshop and notice how shaping the clay makes you feel. The activities we engage in often carry small clues about our character. To discover ourselves, it’s enough to follow these clues.

Sometimes, pause, take a deep breath, and think: Which moments made you feel truly alive? In the moments when you felt real happiness, who were you with, where were you, and what were you doing? As you recall these memories, try writing them down. Writing can help you understand your thoughts better and relax your mind.

Now, imagine the best version of yourself. What profession are you doing? Where are you living? What’s in your daily routine? And most importantly, how far is the distance between your current self and the person you envisioned? Big goals can be intimidating, but you can make them more achievable by breaking them down into smaller steps.

For example, if you want to be someone who regularly exercises, is successful in their career, looks after themselves, and has healthy relationships, instead of trying to change everything all at once, you should start small. Set a sustainable goal like exercising twice a week, instead of committing to five days and giving up after a few weeks. As the habit develops, you can gradually increase it. Using a planner or agenda will help you track your goals and increase your motivation.

You’ve discovered yourself, learned what you like and dislike, and started shaping your habits. So, what’s the next step? Loving and accepting yourself, no matter what. We all make mistakes. Sometimes small mistakes affect our day, and other times they turn into regrets we’ll remember for life. But at the end of the day, it’s us who will continue living with ourselves. If we don’t show love and compassion to ourselves, it’s hard to expect that from others.

"One cannot love others without loving oneself." This is true because we first learn love from ourselves. The tolerance we show to ourselves reflects onto others. But sometimes we punish ourselves and make life harder for ourselves. In those moments, you’ll realize you’re unhappy and pushing away those who truly love you. Instead of blaming yourself or life for the negatives, focus on learning from them. Life is a journey; just because you’ve taken a wrong turn, doesn’t mean the journey is over—it just means the conditions have changed.

When you give yourself the value you deserve, you will notice that you start distancing yourself from people who drain your energy. You can form deep connections with people who view life from the same perspective as you, but it may not be realistic to expect someone far removed from your viewpoint to understand you. We all look at the same sky, but we see it in different colors. What’s important is filling your life with people who think like you, who help you grow, and who are there for you. The greatest investment is the one you make in yourself and the right people. This is exactly the formula for happiness.

In conclusion, creating the best version of yourself is not something that happens in a day; rather, it’s a lifelong journey of discovery. This Valentine's Day, start by approaching yourself with love. Even if it's a small step, do something for yourself. Maybe try a hobby you’ve been putting off for a long time, or simply give yourself a heartfelt thank you. Remember, when you truly love yourself, your life will start transforming into a whole new kind of beauty.